Texas Politics

"Ain't nothin' in the middle of the road but yellow stripes and dead armadillos." - Texas Agriculture Commissioner Jim Hightower

"And now, will y'all stand and be recognized?" - Texas House Speaker Gib Lewis to a group of handicapped people in wheelchairs

"Lemme give ya' a hypothetic." - Texas Rep. Renal Rosson

"Oh good. Now he'll be bi-ignorant." - Texas Agriculture Commissioner Jim Hightower when told that Texas Governor Bill Clements had been studying Spanish

"I'd just make a little bit of money, I wouldn't make a whole lot." - Texas House Speaker Gib Lewis defending himself against the charge that he would personally profit from a bill he introduced.

"Well, there never was a Bible in the room." - Texas Governor Bill Clements, asked about repeatedly lying about the SMU football scandal

"I am filled with humidity." - Texas House Speaker Gib Lewis

"If ignorance ever goes to $40 a barrel, I want drillin' rights on that man's head." - Texas Agriculture Commissioner Jim Hightower discussing President George Bush's policies

"If it's dangerous to talk to yourself, it's probably even dicier to listen..." - Texas Agriculture Commissioner Jim Hightower

"I move we recess to go outside and throw up." - Texas House Speaker Gib Lewis during a budget hearing

"Let's do this in one foul sweep." - Texas House Speaker Bill Clayton

"This is unparalyzed in the state's history." - Texas House Speaker Gib Lewis

"I want to thank each and every one of you for having extinguished yourselves this session." - Texas House Speaker Gib Lewis

"We'll run it up the flagpole and see who salutes that booger." - Texas House Speaker Gib Lewis

"There's a lot of uncertainty that's not clear in my mind." - Texas House Speaker Gib Lewis

"There are still places where people think that the function of the media is to provide information." - Don Rottenberg