An Officer and...

Ten excerpts from Royal Navy and Marines progress reports

1 "His men would follow him anywhere, but only out of curiosity"

2 "I wouldn't breed from this officer"

3 "Works well only when under constant supervision and cornered like a rat"

4 "This man is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot"

5 "This officer should go far and the sooner he starts the better"

6 `This medical officer has used my ship only to carry his genitals from port to port"

7 "When she opens her mouth, it is only to change whichever foot was previously there"

8 "Since my last report he has hit rock bottom and started to dig"

9 "He would be out of his depth in a car park puddle

10 "She sets low standards and then consistently fails to achieve them"