Dumb Guy Jokes

** Why do men like smart women?
....Opposites attract.

** How do men define a "50/50" relationship?
.....We cook -- they eat; we clean -- they dirty; we iron -- they wrinkle.

** How do you get a man to stop biting his nails?
.....Make him wear shoes.

** What did God say after creating man?
.....I can do so much better.

** What's the smartest thing a man can say?
....."My wife says..."

** Why are all dumb blonde jokes one-liners?
.....So men can understand them.

** Why do female black widow spiders kill the males after
mating?
.....To stop the snoring before it starts.

** Why do men need instant replay on TV sports?
.....Because after 30 seconds they forget what happened.

** Why does it take 100 million sperm to fertilize one egg?
.....Because none of them will stop to ask for directions.

** Why is psychoanalysis a lot quicker for men than for women?
.....When it's time to go back to his childhood, he's already there.