Prayer for the Stressed

Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I cannot accept and the wisdom to hide the evidence that I have been using company property for personal purposes, including circulating my resume, searching for more rewarding and satisfying work.

Also, help me to be careful of the toes I step on today as they may be connected to the ass that I may have to kiss tomorrow.

Help me to always give 100% at work....12% on Monday, 23% on Tuesday, 40% on Wednesday, 20% on Thursday and 5% on Fridays.

Help me to remember.....when I'm having a really bad day and it seems that people are working on my last Good Nerve, that it takes 42 muscles to frown and only 4 to extend my middle finger and tell them to bite me.