Jerry Falwell's New Crusade

The Reverend Jerry Falwell recently claimed that Tinky Winky, from the Teletubbies children's television show, was "clearly a fount of gayness." His reasoning is because the character is purple (a "gay" color), has an antenna in a triangle shape (a "gay" symbol) and he carries a purse. However, as I see it, Falwell's work is far from over.


FRED FLINTSTONE

Evidence: His nickname on the Bedrock Bowling Team is "Twinkle-Toes,". The show's theme song ends with the phrase, "We'll have a gay old time," he wears a little orange dress with triangles on it and he hangs out with Barney more than Wilma.


BUGS BUNNY

Evidence: He often stands with his hand on his hip, he played a hairdresser in one episode, he frequently dresses in drag and he loves to throw on a top hat and tails while belting out Broadway show tunes with his buddy Daffy, who, it's worth noting, speaks with an obvious lisp.


VELMA (of Scooby Doo)

Evidence: She always tries to sit next to Daphne in the van. She sports an obvious butch haircut. She has broad shoulders. She is always wearing a thick turtleneck sweater and knee socks and she never once attempted to shag Shaggy.


POPEYE

Evidence: He eats lots of salads, wears a sailor suit even though he hasn't been on a ship in years, frequently does little sailor dances, dates a flat-chested transvestite named Olive Oyl and his best friend is named Wimpy.


BATMAN & ROBIN

Evidence: Robin's nickname is "Boy Wonder," Batman's real name is "Bruce," they both wear tights and they both are in great shape.


PEPPERMINT PATTY

Evidence: She has a deep, gravelly voice, she always wears pants and not dresses like all the rest of the Peanuts girls, she plays a mean game of football, she is always hanging out with the very androgynous Marcie, she always wears comfortable shoes and her nickname is "Sir."


PINK PANTHER:

'Nuff said.