TJ's Funny Pages

 


Section: 2002 Humor
Category: Religon 
 
 



 









 

Atheist and The Bear

An atheist was walking through the woods one day in Alaska, admiring all that evolution had created. "What majestic trees! What a powerful river! What beautiful animals!" he said to himself.

As he was walking alongside the river, he heard a rustling in the bushes behind him. Turning to look, he saw a huge Kodiak brown bear charging toward him. He ran as fast as he could down the path. He looked over his shoulder and saw that the bear was rapidly closing on him. Somehow, he ran even faster, so scared that tears came to his eyes. He looked again and the bear was even closer. His heart pounding in his chest, he tried to run faster yet. But alas, he tripped and fell to the ground. As he rolled over to pick himself up, the bear was right on top of him. It held him down with its left paw and raised its right paw to strike. The man screamed, "OH MY GOD!"

The bear froze. The forest was silent. Even the river stopped moving. A brilliant light shone upon the man, and a thunderous voice came from all around. "YOU DENY MY EXISTENCE FOR ALL THESE YEARS. YOU TEACH OTHERS THAT I DON'T EXIST. YOU CREDIT CREATION TO SOME COSMIC ACCIDENT. DO YOU EXPECT ME TO HELP YOU NOW? AM I TO NOW COUNT YOU AS A BELIEVER?"

Difficult as it was, the atheist looked directly into the light and said, "It would be hypocritical of me to act as a Christian after all these years, but perhaps you could make the bear a Christian?"

"VERY WELL" said the voice.

The light went out. The river ran. The sounds of the forest resumed. And the bear dropped down on its knees, brought both paws together and with bowed head said "Lord, thank you for this food which I am about to receive."


Contributed by: Cindy C.



 







 
At My Funeral ~ Authur Andersen Christmas Party

Section: 2002 Humor
Category: Religon