Leroy & Jasper

Two boys from the West Virginia mountains, Leroy and Jasper have been promoted from privates to sergeants. Not long after, they're out for a walk and Leroy says, "Hey, Jasper, there's the NCO Club. Let's you and me stop in".

"But we's privates," protests Jasper.

"We's sergeants now", says Leroy, pulling him inside. "I'm a-gonna sit down and have me a drink."

"But we's privates," says Jasper.

"Are you blind, boy?" asks Leroy, pointing at his stripes. "We's sergeants now."

So they have their drink, and pretty soon a hooker comes up to Leroy. "You're cute," she says, "and I'd like to date you, but I have a bad STD."

Leroy pulls his friend to the side and whispers, "Jasper, go look in the dictionary and see what STD means. If it's alright, give me the okay sign."

So Jasper goes to look it up, comes back, and gives Leroy the big okay sign.

Three weeks later Leroy is laid up in the infirmary with a terrible STD. "Jasper", he says, "why did you give me the okay?"

"Well, Leroy, in the dictionary, it says STD's affects only the privates." He points to his stripes. "But we's sergeants now."