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A Texas Air Traffic Control Conversation:

Dallas ATC:  "Tower to Saudi Air  911--You are cleared to land eastbound on runway 9R." 

 

Saudi Air: "Thank you Dallas ATC.  Acknowledge cleared to land on infidel's runway 9R --Allah be Praised!!" 

Dallas ATC: "Tower to Iran Air 711--You are cleared to land westbound on runway 9R." 

Iran Air: "Thank you Dallas ATC.  We are cleared to land on infidel's runway 9R.- -Allah is Great!!" 

Pause: Static............. 

Saudi Air: "DALLAS ATC !  DALLAS ATC !

Dallas ATC: "Go ahead Saudi Air 911?" 

Saudi Air: "YOU HAVE CLEARED BOTH OUR AIRCRAFT FOR THE SAME RUNWAY GOING IN OPPOSITE DIRECTIONS !!!   WE ARE ON A COLLISION COURSE !!! 

INSTRUCTIONS PLEASE!!! 

Dallas ATC:  "Well bless your hearts.  Y'all be careful now and tell Allah 'hey' for us -- ya hear?