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1. You grow poppies and refine heroin for a living, but you have a moral objection to liquor. 

You may be a Muslim

 

2. You own a $3,000 machine gun and $5,000 rocket launcher and ammo, but you can't afford shoes. 

You may be a Muslim

 

 

3. You have more wives than teeth.  

You may be a Muslim

 

4. You wipe your butt with your bare hand, but consider bacon and pork unclean.

You may be a Muslim

 

5. You think vests come in two styles: bullet-proof and suicide.

You may be a Muslim

 

6. You can't think of anyone you haven't declared Jihad against. 

You may be a Muslim

    

7. You consider television dangerous, but routinely carry explosives in your clothing.

You may be a Muslim

 

8. You were amazed to discover that cell phones have uses other than setting off roadside bombs. 

You may be a Muslim  

 

9. You have nothing against women and think every man should own at least four.  

You may be a Muslim

 

10. Your cousin is president of the United States . 

You may be a Muslim